A Japanese Wedding

Background information

In these past 9 years, I have been 'fortunate' enough for not having been invited to attend a wedding ceremony. Predominantly because it will be a very expensive participation if I were to attend all friend's celebration, as explained here.

But for Toru and Yone, I cherished the invitation. I am honored to be invited and included in their joyous celebration. In fact, I actually asked him not to hesitate in inviting me when he first started talking about marrying Yone last year. I remember telling him, "I know that you know I've been dodging wedding invitations all these years. But for yours, by all means, I will be most happy to attend."

The Wedding Day

Everything started at 11 AM. This is when the door to Terakoya opens. The couple and their family members had already gathered for some photo sessions earlier that day. Terakoya is a very beautiful French restaurant with a stunning garden on a hilly landscape. Toru and Yone were both doing a little bit of a rehearsal, while some early birds have already showed up and had a peek on their rehearsal procession.

The wedding itself was a simple one. Neither Toru nor Yone are particularly religious, so they decided not to have any religious ceremony.

The procession start at 11:30 AM. All of the friends and families gathered at the grassy area with soap bubble maker in hands. We were encouraged to make soap bubbles at any given time during the procession.
Once we're ready, a keyboardist started making some music, and the groom showed up and started picking up the flowers from some of the friends, and made a small bouquet. Toru was looking very smart in his black suit (not tuxedo).

Not long after, the wedding march began and we were looking at the gate. Yone walked with her father towards the miniature river and Toru came to pick Yone up from her father. The groom then helped the bride crossed the small bridge and they walked to the top of the hill.
Then Toru started his vow. I can't remember what he said exactly, but I remembered thinking that what he said was absolutely perfect and comical, and very Toru-like.
And then Yone's turn was up. Her vow was truly heartfelt and so many of us were moved to tears.
After that they exchanged rings and were officially declared husband and wife.
The fathers of the bride and the groom then joined as witnesses and signed on a large parchment and they held it up like an award.

So really nothing out of the extra ordinary. It's pretty much like a church wedding, but without the priest and the church.



The reception was pretty much regular. The room was divided into the groom side and the bride side. I was seated right in the middle of Toru's close friends from university. It started with a short recap on Toru and Yone's life history, and then a toast and then a very fine meal. People will go table-hop with a bottle of beer and start introducing themselves to each other, while topping off the visited table's beer glass. Most of the people who table-hopped are the family members of the bride and the groom; as they are the one who usually know everybody.
I made 3 table-hops, first to the couple's table, and then to the bride's parents and then to the groom's parents. The visit was returned by the parents and the brothers and the sisters.
The couple also made a round to everyone's table and thanking every single person's attendance, while giving some small token of appreciation. Oh, one more thing to add, when I just arrived at my table (which is right in front of the bride and groom's table), I found that everyone's name card was equipped with a personal message from the bride or the groom. I got a very nice note from Toru! :)



Everything finished at 4 PM. This was then followed by the nijikai (after-party) at a completely different location. Majority of the attendance at the nijikai are those who did not attend the wedding ceremony. There was a slideshow from the wedding and skits provided by Yone's girls rugby team during her years at uni. And Toru's friends also gave a "Boot Camp" skit, which was actually hillarious. All the boys colored their face to be extremely brown and did a Billy Blanks impression with Toru and was completely hillarious.

In conclusion, this Japanese wedding was pretty much like any other wedding, nothing quite "Japanese-y" per se. The biggest difference in comparison to a typical western wedding will be the type of clothing that the family wears, as they are mostly very formal kimonos.

Oh, there was a bouquet throwing at the end of the nijikai, and guess who got the bouquet? Yes, me. People are saying I will be next because of that flower bouquet violently fell into my hands. First, I need to get me a boyfriend, then maybe I will believe this 'omen' or whatever.



Also, it is a little confusing, perhaps, to be calling this a wedding day. Toru and Yone were lawfully wed earlier in the year already, at the city hall. So, that day will be referred to as "city hall wedding". June 16 is the "official wedding day". Toru and Yone are coming over tonight to feast on some tiramisu, so I'm going to ask them then on which date they will be celebrating their wedding anniversary.